I cried for the first time in over a month tonight.

But I'll never let them see me slippin'.

There Will Always Be Those Days

Lately, I've been riding out what I like to call my "life high"; by "life High" I mean everything has been pretty great. School has been getting a little more tough, but I enjoy the fight. I've had the opportunity to see my best friends three times within the last four weeks. I've picked up my guitar again and have been experimenting with sounds and songs, which feels so amazing. Overall, I really can't complain. Honestly, I thought the last few weeks were going to be absolute hell, considering the types of change I've had to adjust to. But really, things haven't been bad.

If you know me, you know that there is one rule - I guess you can say -  that I have for myself and that I share with others if they ask me for advice: Always allow yourself to feel and embrace every single emotion, whether it be good or bad. And with the more negative emotions, give yourself a certain amount of time to feel that way, and then let it go.

I think the reason why I'm writing this blog is not only to pass that thought on to other people, but to also embrace and let go of the weird feeling I've had the past two days. I'm not sad or angry, I've just felt off. Dull, maybe? But most certainly not as upbeat as usual. I've been relearning how to become a much more independent person, and I think I've been mixing that with relying on other things in order to avoid this 'dull' feeling I always knew was still hiding somewhere inside of me...which totally defeats the purpose of what I've said before. Maybe I just felt like I didn't need to feel low because everything from the outside was so awesome. Alas, I can no longer suppress this feeling.

With every 'high', there is always going to be a 'low'. This is my low. And I'm okay with that. I'm finally allowing myself to be brave, take time to relax, and let it all pass. I know that after this, there will be another 'high', and life will continue to be amazing and beautiful.




Cheers, x

idevenk

*lets out HUGE sigh*

I suppose Project "Do Things That Make Marcia Happy And Help Her Move On With Her Life And Also Hopefully Make Her A Movie Star" starts today. Ugh, sounds tiring. I know.

I've secretly been sitting here, trying to figure out what I want to say. But full thoughts aren't forming in my brain, so I'm just going to make bullet points:



-Started today getting reacquainted with Mr. Insomnia. He's a nice guy. Just kidding, he's not.

-I know my dad wants to go running tonight, but I need to run this morning. I can't continue sitting in bed with my thoughts.

-Also, I want to study abroad. I've always wanted to do it, so I think that's my goal for this year. I have no money, but who cares! Hooray!

-I hate everyone.

-Maybe not everyone, but close.

-Now I'm just angry.



Cheers.

Stream of Thoughts

Good morning.

So I gave myself a little more than enough time this morning to eat breakfast, watch Walking Dead, and write a blog post. I don't really feel like organizing my thoughts, so I'll just type whatever comes into my mind:

I'm actually still quite tired. I'd very much like to go back to bed (or at least lay in it for another two hours), but ALAS! I have to go to work and make that paper....pretend I said that in Snoop Dogg's voice. 

If anyone knows where I can watch this past season (I think it's season 4?) of Walking Dead, let me know pleeeease! I don't ever watch TV and we're too cheap for a DVR, so some info would be much appreciated. OH! The guy that plays Glen on The Walking Dead came into my work the other night. It was really awesome and he was such a nice guy. He thanked me for all the help and shook my hand (very soft hands, I must say). 

A new video will be going up tomorrow that should've been up during my super duper failed attempt at Vlogmas 2013. I'm actually kinda glad that I didn't put it up during Vlogmas because:

1. I wasn't too prepared to take on the daily task of vlogging or editing a new video everyday.

2. Editing takes fooooooreeeeeeveeeeeeer.

3. Now I can spread out my video ideas to leave time to think of more ideas and to somehow obtain a new camera.

Only a month and a half more until I'm 21. Meaning I'm going to finally fulfill my lifelong dream of going to Chevy's and taking advantage of happy hour. Chips and Margaritas, hollaaaaa.

Also, I have no friends. 

Cheers! x

Cheers to the New Year!!

Thank goodness it's a new year! 2013 was a real pain in my butt, but I'm determined to make the most out of this year. I turn 21, I'm actually gonna transfer out of a damn community college, and I'll probably take over the world, so I'm quite excited for the coming year.

This post isn't going to be anything to elaborate, but I just wanted to get my mind back into blogging. Going to film and edit a few videos this morning and see what the day has in store for me. Probably some Netflix and chocolate.



Cheers! x

ANOTHER New Video (: ❆Vlogmas day 3! ❆ - Playing Heads Up!

Double the video posts today since it didn't completely upload in time for a post last night. I'm soooo tired. 

Cheers! x

New Video (: ❆Vlogmas day 2! ❆

Cheers! x (sorry for posting only videos. I'm exhausted.)